Awkward Family Photo

This blog is centered around this photo here that I found while perusing through the “pictures” file on my computer. This was taken in 1979 and it’s my family. Appearances have been altered to protect the innocent and so my mom doesn’t kick my butt.
My dad still has that same Geraldo Rivera mustache and I’m pretty sure he still wears those plastic glasses too. For my parent’s 25th wedding anniversary I slaved over a family photo album for a YEAR and when my mom looked at it, all she said was “Oh my GAWD look at my HAIR!!!!” Twenty five years worth of memories and that’s all she notices? Then again, all that hair IS hard to miss. I love that my mom had a “fro”. I mean, that’s just awesome.
As you can see, my eyes are all red and puffy. Clearly, I’ve just had a fit of some kind and someone managed to get me to quit sobbing long enough to have my picture taken. I can only speculate the reason for this episode is the outfit I’m wearing. It looks like a quilt. I’m wearing a quilt! It’s that or a table cloth…exactly which cannot be determined. And is that a shiny bronze shirt my dad has on? And Mom, poor Mom. My mom is the most amazing dresser I have ever met. She’s classy and gorgeous, but to not make fun of that blazer would be a crime against humanity. I could SWEAR I had a bedspread made out of the same material as that thing! My baby brother is the only one to escape bad couture in this picture. Lucky S.O.B.
There was a white dog that was somehow cropped out of this picture. His name was Muffin. There’s this email that goes around every now and then that says to find your stripper name use your first pet’s name and the street you grew up on. My stripper name is Muffin Collins. Can’t get much better than that.
Hurry up and read this post before my mom makes me take it down. :) Still love me, Mommy?